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Yesterday someone shared a Medium post that I really liked reading. It has a lot of bits that really resonated with me, talking about being part of the queer community and dealing with the recent attack on the LGBT community in Orlando. In particular, this quote: Am I allowed to feel this devastated, this full of rage? Am I gay enough to be this upset? Am I appropriating the grief of real gay people?

I started therapy with a therapist whose primary approach is Cognitive Behavior Therapy, rather than “just” check-ins with my prescribing doctor about my moods & how the meds are going, in early February. That shit is HARD. I’ve heard “lets look at it a different way” and “But what if it wasn’t?” a LOT, recently. Lots about self-care, and ways to basically hack my life and manage expectations so that I feel better about where I am now, rather than frustrated about where I could be.

This ribbed and bobbled hat with simple cables and knit-on i-cord came about as a present for a friend who is well known for his unique and enthusiastic relationship with that food we all know and love: pizza! He spends a lot of time out in the cold, and I wanted him to be warm while repping that cheesy goodness, and thus: the pizza love hat! Download PDF Version Here.

When I’m done knitting something, and I’ve finished it all up, woven in the ends, sewed the armpits, washed and blocked it, and done all the fiddly bits, there’s always a moment when I want to run a victory lap around the house. When it’s New Years Eve, and I’m working on Christmas (aka deadline) knitting, and everything came together exactly as I intended, well… some bragging may be in order.

We’re finally wrapping up 2015, and a lot of people seem to like doing some kind of end of year wrap-up. That’s not usually me, but since I’m at the edge of someplace good, and it’s the edge of the year, just this once I’m going to make an exception. Ladies and gentlemen, the State of the Rachael - is strong. No, really. I think me and my doctor are done adjusting meds for awhile, and while life isn’t perfect, it’s so much better than it was a year or even six months ago, that there really isn’t any comparison.

I would love to say that I will always be right, will never take up a position that is indefensible, or untenable, never just simply make a mistake. I know better, though, I’ve stuck my foot in it before, and likely will again, sometime soon - might be in the midst of it, now, even. This last week I watched someone else put THEIR foot in it, and briefly noted it on twitter, with the ever-eloquent “are you FUCKING kidding, Seattle Weekly?

So, my friend Christina has a serious love-affair with pork rinds. She has a local bar that makes them in-house, and they are apparently mana from heaven. You know, in fried pig-bit form. Now, I’m not PARTICULARLY a fan of pork-rinds myself, but far be it from me to cast aspersions on someone else’s snack-preferences. What I WILL gently mock, though, is her attempts to express her love via emoji. This was Christina’s initial attempt at pork rinds in emoji: 🐽🍋.

I got an amazing array of answers to my question, and I thought I would share with you all, the answer I was looking for, care of Nathan Corvino, among others. The initial error, about updating the current branch of a working copy is denied because it will make the index and and work tree inconsistent, and will require a git reset --hard to fix it, is there to prevent you from forcing changes over someone else’s local work.

Being treated for mental illness with medicines is not as easy as, say, being treated for an infection with an antibiotic. There’s an amazing and somewhat horrifying amount of guesswork involved. There’s no blood test for depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, obsessive-compulsive disorder, or the slew of other things that effect a broad swath of humanity (yet). There’s no way to measure what exactly is lacking, or overdone, or exactly what needs adjusted, to bring someone back towards the mean.

Some background: I’ve been an Subversion user for 12 or so years now. I understand the model, I can, with a little patience, get it to dance to my every whim. The model of a centralized bucket of ‘truth’ that I can push changes to from my local working copy is one that clicks with me. My buddy Tim keeps trying to explain the concepts of git, and each time I think I get it a little more, but it’s still pretty intimidating.